Welcome to Vancouver's number one Tourist and Drug Dealer Destination: the Fabulous Sky-Train!

We ponder life on the tracks, as we stuff our Hockey Bag with Metrotown freebies from the "5-Finger Discount Store".  We wander past Edmonds, where "Stupid Graffiti" lurks in the bush.  We careen out to dismal New Westminster and visit the Sally Anne Superstore, just a hop from the New West Station, long known as a Central American refugee cocaine depot.

Just where are all the decent people when you need them?  Hypnotized by the hum of time, the clatter of the tracks, the nervous metallic female voice that announces your dropoff point.  It could be a slum in Malaysia, a wrong turn in Tokyo, a Cuban cargo ship.

No, it's merely the SkyTrain, and you're dreaming again.

You're on your way to the Brooklyn Pub for a beer and a Caesar Chicken Wrap.

All kidding aside, the SKYTRAIN - besides its ample endowment of graffiti of all descriptions - it's also the closest thing that Vancouver has to a "real" rapid transit system. This city is known for its political potpourri and its backward and stuck energy when it comes to making any kind of sound strategic decisions around city planning.  It's compromise, ambiguity and mayhem run amuck. 

The SkyTrain actually WORKS!  It can get you from downtown to the 'burbs' in 20 minutes.  You escape arrogant SUV drivers, blonde brainless women talking on their cellphones as they wantonly kill whatever is in their way, and albino alligators that surface from the sewers on Commercial Drive.

Edmonds Station area - circa 2002.  Pickins are slim, but the tags are fat. Just a handful of colorful bombs featuring shiny metallic silver paint.  Warehouse walls have never looked happier. Not sure who runs the "goon squad" in Burnaby, but it ain't "Mike"...

Broadway-Renfrew is an area known for "mega stores", Pets'R'Us, Home Despot and other likely targets for the Beaverton Family in their cranky SUV on a Sunday Morning.  What a nice alternative to Church! The B'way Line is continual source of amusement for the Krylon Klub on Sundays and any other day, when God is not watching! This batch taken in 2002 when we were all young idiots.

Broadway-Clark: a slightly more modern version of Hippie Hysteria.  Runs thru that god-forsaken gully in East Van that (get this) the animal rights activists pouted over when they wanted to build the long-overdue B'way extension. Something about interfering with Beaver Migration.  Makes you want to drink even more, doesn't it Darling?

Edmonds is re-born in 2005 - thanks to the Amazing Murals that add some discreet Post Modernist Charm to the otherwise working-class tags in the area.  A few very nice pieces on the derriere of the fabled "Burnaby Insulation Supplies" building.